By: Monaliza Viktoriya
Love. The most talked about, written about, topic of all time. Shakespeare wrote many beautiful plays about it, but did he really know what he was writing about? Did he write from personal agony of heartbreak or was it just his fancy to write a silly play about forlorn lovers torn apart by fate? After all, his famous quote rings true for so many of us, “The course of true love never did run smooth.” I’ve been inside the Shakespearean plays, the heroine who makes those difficult choices, who doesn’t get her happy ending, whose fate does not work out in her favor, but in pain and sorrow of good bye. Most of my “relationships” weren’t even relationships, they were emotional entanglements of circumstances that never worked out, emotional “affairs” of the heart that weren’t even real affairs. I seemed to always have “circumstances” beyond my control that dictated the outcome of the situation and I felt like an outsider observing from above how my heart was getting broken into a thousand pieces and all I could do was watch it like a bad play that you wish ended differently, but you weren’t the playwright, and so you just watched as an audience member, present, but afraid to participate. Fear. Fear has a lot to do with love. Maybe in some instances it was fear that made me the unwilling audience member in a terrible play or maybe, just maybe they were just experiences I chose to experience for the highest evolution of me. It’s what I needed at the time. Perhaps. Perhaps not. I’ll never know why it never worked out with this person or why I loved that person and why it couldn’t be different with all of them.